How to Tune Into What You Want in Relationships

Have you had troubles in past relationships? Maybe you start something new with excitement and with the best of intentions, but it never seems to work out the way you think it should. 

While there are many possibilities and potential reasons for relationships not “feeling” right, one possible reason could be that you’re not fully in tune with what you really want from a potential partner. 

That might sound silly, at first. After all, you know yourself better than anyone, right? But when was the last time you checked in to determine what you want in a relationship and how you want to feel about the person you’re with?

Let’s take a closer look at how to tune into those things so that the next relationship you step into has a better chance of being something that feels right. 

1. Consider Your Core Values

One of the best ways to consider what you really want in relationships is to examine your core values. You might think you know what they are, but when was the last time you really tapped into the things that make you who you are?

Core values include things like how you feel about family, communication, and even finances. You might have core values about religion or certain principles you follow. There really aren’t any right or wrong core values, as long as they’re true to who you are. 

When you have a deep understanding of your core values (including things that might be dealbreakers), you’ll have an easier time finding someone who lines up with those values without wasting your time dating someone who might not. 

2. Think About Who You Admire

If there are any couples in your life you look at with admiration, consider what it is about them that’s so appealing. Are they great communicators? Do they seem to have a healthy physical relationship? Maybe everything they do with each other seems to be under the umbrella of great respect. 

Think about what you like about those relationships, and why, and you can carry those things with you as you look for a relationship of your own. Don’t hesitate to ask some of those couples about how they make things work and how they deal with everyday challenges. 

3. Look to the Future

Most people who want a serious relationship want to spend years with the right person. So, when you’re considering a relationship, don’t just think about the here and now. 

Consider what you envision for your future and how a partner would fit into that. Again, you can look back at your core values to consider what you might want later on in life. What kind of important decisions will you have to make with a partner, and what should you look for in a person who can help you with those decisions?

4. Take Time for Yourself

Alone time might seem counterproductive when you’re trying to find a healthy relationship. But, if you’re trying to tune into what you really want, spending time by yourself is one of the most effective ways to accomplish that. 

Prioritize self-care every day. Get enough sleep, eat foods that make you feel good, and stay physically active. Try things like meditation and journaling to manage your mental well-being and become more in tune with yourself. 

Therapy can also help you better understand who you are and what you want while prioritizing your well-being. It’s not always easy to tune into those things on your own. So, if you’ve struggled in the past, feel free to contact me to set up an appointment for anxiety treatment soon. Managing your mental health can be a great way to step into your next relationship feeling happy, healthy, and whole.